Factors to Consider First
A hard look at the past may provide a clearer picture as to the challenges facing someone attempting to reenter an ex's life. Seemingly elementary, most people skip this step for multiple reasons. Perhaps they are driven by loneliness to see their ex as someone they are not. Or things ended in a state of ambivalence, they wonder how the new relationship may mimic the previous attempt. Two important things to consider give a clear indication of how to proceed.
Way Things Ended: The parting shows the way things were during the course of a relationship. Pain over the end can cloud judgement. Seeing how each person left and the things said will help prognosticate how likely things will begin again.
* With A Whimper: An amicable ending often leaves the door open for a second pass.
* A Low Rumbling: Things might need some time to pass before one and their ex may consider reconnecting.
* Global Thermal Nuclear War: Accusations, shouting and broken belongs bode ill for any return relational status.
|Ticking Clock to Get Back with an Ex|
Current Relational Status: As with any romantic foray, those who have moved to another individual tend to not look back at past relationships. If the ex has found another person and is making a life with them, no amount of time will be appropriate while they remain together.
This can be challenging for people because of the dual fronts being evaluated. First, the relationship itself, both past and future, need to be treated as a new thing. This means setting aside past hurts and joys while taking it on face value allowing it to grow naturally. Second, one's own excitement or reticence drive expectations into unrealistic areas. Hope, love, pain and disappointment can supercharge how a person views things moving forward.
And The Answer Is
Reading stories of those reconnecting with high school sweethearts and rekindling relationships thought long dead provides the greatest indicator of expiration dates on relationships. Truly, connection and love overcome almost any barrier, even time. The constructed concern about it being too long is valid only in light of other, more important, factors. Time grows to be more an excuse rather than a true hurdle to getting back with one's ex.
This means if the relationship is right, even if it has been a while since each person went their separate ways, it can be rekindled and flourish. A wise person capable of considering all the key factors and managing their expectations opens up an opportunity to love with someone they know and care for. They need courage most of all to not let their own fear stop them from taking the risk.