To most people a one night stand is like a trophy. Being able to sleep with someone for just one night and then separate without any attachment whatsoever is a tricky task.
You get to indulge in the finer things in life without having to deal with the complicated process of forming a relationship. But where do you draw the line when it comes to one night stands?
Of all the people you could have a one night stand with, an ex is one of the most complicated. In the heat of the moment you may find yourself about to hook up with someone you thought you were never going to be with again.
If all goes well, it can be quite the treat. There is always the possibility however, that it will not. To avoid unnecessary drama in your life, there are a few things you should consider before hooking up with an ex, even for "old times' sake".
Is Anything Clouding Your Judgement?
This is the first thing you should always ask yourself if you are considering this situation. Hooking up with your ex can lead to a landslide of regret the following morning if you realize it's not something you really wanted to do.
If you are under the influence of any drugs or alcohol your decision making skills take a back seat and impulse and desire take over the wheel. Many impaired people let their clouded judgement take control and forget to think over consequences.
If you know there is a possibility of hooking up with your ex, make sure you have considered it with a completely sober mindset first.
Consider Why You Broke Up To Begin With
It is hard to define whether or not you should have a one night stand with your ex since it is so circumstantial. Certain people have no problem doing it and with others it leads to turmoil.
Analyze the way your relationship was and think about why it ended. Which one of you wanted to end it? Did you split up on good terms?
If you were the one that wanted to break it off, you should find out whether or not your ex still has feelings for you. They could be expecting something much different to come from the one night stand.
You don't want to hook up with them if it means you will end up breaking their heart all over again. To solve this issue, make it clear that it is only a one night deal. If you are both mature about it with control of your feelings, it could be fine.
Think About What You Are Looking For
The last thing to do before you hook up with an ex is to find out why you are doing it. Analyze the motives behind your actions before making the big decision.
Do you want to do it purely for the sex? If this is the case than why did you choose your ex? There are plenty of other new experiences laying ahead of you that you could be exploring.
If you are doing it purely for the comfort of being with someone you know, make sure you keep it strictly physical with minimal emotions.
But perhaps you are doing it for another reason. Is the one night stand motivated by a desire to be with them? If so, then why pick a one night stand? If the desire is strong enough, talk to your ex about your feelings and find out where they stand to see if your feelings match up.
Just be aware, if they are looking for sex and you are looking for a relationship, you could end up getting hurt. With all this in mind, deciding whether or not to hook up with your ex will be a lot easier. Before you make a final decision, prepare yourself for the fact that one night stands can toy with emotions before making your decision. Analyze the motives of you and your partner and just to be safe, make a set of rules that define the night as a one time thing.