Bring Closure to the Relationships
Think about how many ceremonies we have to mark important life events – baptism of a baby, Bar Mitzvah, Graduation, Marriage, and even Funerals.
Breaking up with someone special is a major life event. Yet there are no ceremonies to mark it. So, in order to bring closure to a relationship, you may have to create your own.
Here's one that has worked for many people.
Write a long letter to your ex about how you felt about him or her and the relationship you shared. You can include the good times and the bad. You can talk about your love and your hurt.
But when you're done, don't send the letter. Instead, light a candle and slowly burn the letter. You'll feel that the relationship is truly over when you do this.
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After a relationship is over, you may feel like sitting around in your room eating Ben and Jerry's and playing sad songs. But, it is important that you get back into the swing of life as a single person.
Go to family events and make a point of going out with friends. Don't dwell on the past. When someone brings up your ex, say “thanks, but I'm moving on now.”
You now have time to pursue activities and interests that your ex didn't care for. So, plan to take a class, join a group, or get involved with something meaningful. Not only will this fill the hours you used to spend with your ex, it will also give you a sense of renewed purpose. Additionally, you will meet new people at a time when you may feel that you are all alone.
Join a gym – and actually use the membership! Working out will make you feel better if you are slightly depressed. You'll also begin to look better which will make you a more attractive candidate to the opposite sex.
Because soon, you will be joining the dating pool again. Don't worry if the first person who asks you out doesn't seem to be a candidate for the love of your life. Just go and enjoy yourself. It will be good practice for when you meet someone really attractive to you.
You will know that you are over your ex when you fall in love again.
A break up may or may not be the end of a relationship. How you handle the break up may determine whether you can get back together or not.
If getting back together is a priority, don't wreck the process by being too eager. Be casual. As you do get back together, focus on fixing what went wrong. Also, step back and ratchet your relationship down a notch. These two things will give you a better chance of getting the relationship back on the right track.
If the relationship is truly over, there is a mourning process which is natural. But the sooner you can move on the better. That's why you should bring closure to the relationship. Sort out what's yours and what is your ex's. Then, re-enter the social scene as a single man or woman.
Relationships can bring much joy to our lives. On the flip side, they can bring pain. I wish you much luck as you sort out breaking up to making up.